Die zeitmagazin
14th March 1997
Melanie is entering a convent. She is 25 years old and is becoming a sister at Himmelspforten, a Carmelite convent in W?rzburg. "I believe God has led me on this path," she says. If it is the right path, she will stay in the convent all her life-her body will remain there even longer. The catholic Carmel order is strict: the sisters never leave except for medical emergencies. When they die, their bodies are buried beneath the chapel. The sisters do not carry out any missionary or social work; they see their main calling as prayer. They converse only when necessary, apart from a daily conversation meeting of one hour. "To live in the succession of Jesus Christ, to serve Him faithfully with a pure heart and a clear conscience" is the order's precept.
Melanie is spending her last night out with her sister Nina and her friend Rebecca, with whom she has shared a flat for the past four years. They pray, sing and talk a lot. In the morning, there are bibles and prayer books on the floor in between the mattresses and sleeping bags-and tissues. Melanie looks pale. She has been praying herself to sleep for weeks. She packs her last items: nightdress, toothbrush, Bible. She writes a few postcards, jots down telephone numbers, tries to call her parents and her grandmother. Outside, church bells are ringing. There are 77 churches and 16 monasteries in W?rzburg; it is All Soul's Day.
Melanie will be reunited with three old friends at the convent: now called Maria Miriam, Maria Beata and Maria Johanna. Melanie is the last to join because she decided to finish her degree in Christian psychology. There are 22 sisters at the convent. Most never leave the building, their "gate sisters" do the shopping and go to the post office. Ten years ago monastic life seemed set to disappear, but the trend is changing. There are now 20 Carmel convents in Germany and 860 worldwide.
Just before 10am Melanie, Nina and Rebecca hurry to St Joseph's church. Since Melanie converted to catholicism, she has attended mass almost every day. Nina and Rebecca are protestant, but they do not mind. Today is Melanie's day. Nina begins to cry. Melanie interrupts her prayer to comfort her sister. Then they both weep.
After church, Rebecca buys things for lunch: frozen calamares and chips-she is afraid that her friend might never have this again. Melanie is nervous, but tries not to show it. She does not want to be late. The contents of her bag will soon be stored in the convent's attic; there is no room for superfluous personal belongings in the cells. No wardrobe, just a bed, a table, a chair and a crucifix on the wall. No running water or carpet. About a year from now, Melanie will probably be wearing the nun's brown dress, belt, white veil and beige mantle. But before she puts on the Virgin Mary's attire, she will be Christ's bride in a white dress, with flowers in her hair.
Two more hours before her new life begins. The women go into town to meet more friends who will walk Melanie to the convent. They enter a caf? with pastel decor and waiters with white aprons. Melanie is fidgety now. There is little time, and the clocks at the convent are five minutes fast. "You will have lots of time to focus on yourself," one of her friends says. "Not on myself," she replies, "but on God." Melanie pays for everyone and hands her purse to Rebecca, who jokes: "I am her executor."
The group hurries across the meadows by the river Main. "Your last look at this beautiful river," says one friend. The convent is right next to the river, but the garden walls are six metres high.
At the gate Sister Bernadette and Sister Benedicta welcome the group; they have never seen such a crowd for an occasion like this. Sister Benedicta is elated to receive visitors and guides them to the sacristy. Melanie starts to say her goodbyes, hugging everyone in turn. Some of her friends weep. As practising Christians, they understand Melanie's decision.
The door opens. Behind it the sisters are standing in two rows, in order of seniority. Sister Petra, the novice master, comes forward and welcomes Melanie. Her task is to look after the new sisters. Nina grabs her guitar and the visitors sing a blessing. Then Melanie walks through the door and is welcomed by the most senior sister. The nuns hug her. Smiling, she steps into her new life.
As the visitors leave, Sister Petra consoles Nina: "You will always be welcome to visit, just call beforehand. You will see that a Carmel sister's relationships deepen after she joins. Conversation here is more intense. Of course I ask myself whether we are achieving anything. We cannot even feed ourselves with our garden, we depend on charity." But, she explains: "We pray for the people outside, to influence the course of the world. We are all happy here, and that is proof of God's presence. We would not be happy without God's help. Is that not true, Melanie? You are very quiet." Melanie looks tired and replies: "But everything you say is right, Sister Petra."
Three months after joining the convent Melanie is ordered to leave. One theological and two psychological assessments persuaded the sisters to release her-even though the assessors did not meet Melanie personally. "I think my crying disturbed Sister Petra," Melanie says. "But I still think this is the right path." Melanie has already arranged for another assessment. She is fighting to be admitted to another Carmelite convent.
